growl.

Dec. 19th, 2005 10:12 pm
daniwithtea: (broken)
I'm cranky, and tired, and moody. That was your warning to run away.

I went to pay the bills today (because I didn't pay them last week when we got paid like I should have) and discovered some things that I fucked up last month, probably because I was so damn busy with work that I didn't know which was was up. So I'm popping Buspar because money is one of THE triggers, the ones that set me off and make me go kaplooey into evil, melodramatic, crazy in the literal sense Dani. And I'm pissed. Not only because I fucked up the bills, but because after all this time, it's still the same damn triggers that get me, money being the biggest of them all. Logically I know that being able to see "ooh, that's a big trigger, possible freak-out ahead, take your anti-anxiety drugs NOW" and do it is a good thing. I guess I just wish I didn't have those triggers anymore, feel like I should have gotten a handle on them somehow. All fires are out, everything that needs paying has been paid, s'all good on the surface.

There's something else nagging at me, that I didn't realize was bothering me so much until I vented at one of the girls at work today about it. All of our friends (IRL, LJ, and otherwise) have been very much "whee!" at the ring/party/presents concept. But our families, those who know so far, have been more along the lines of "oh, that's nice."

Um, 'scuse me?

How is it that y'all love us both to death, treat us as an old married couple, and then when it comes down to this, it's just "nice? I don't fucking think so. I've been through this deal before, and I seem to remember it being a little different last time. I want to know what the deal is. Stand up and say it if you've got a problem with it. Don't act like it doesn't bother you and treat us both like the family of bitter old dykes we are for two and a half fucking years and then act wierd because we want to have a party. It'll be interesting to get the rest of the reactions over the holidays.

As a random aside, Brian Setzer's drummer looks like Elvis Costello. Very strange.

For something completely non-ranty, I'm not going to have a chance to send out winter holiday goodies this year; however, my mom and i will be baking cookies in February (since we couldn't do our normal holiday numminess), so if you want goodies then, including our Magical Mint Cookies (secret family recipe), let me know.

ETA: I don't know what happened with the formatting there, but it's better now.

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daniwithtea

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